He pulled Nan Zhiyun into his embrace, then lay down beside her.
"Yun'er... don't leave, don't think of escaping. If there's a next time, I don't know what I'll do. I might hurt you, so... don't make things difficult for me." Yu Jingchen was conflicted. He wanted to confine her completely, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. If he did, their distance would only grow.
Their relationship was already strained, and this incident would make it even harder to repair.
He gently stroked Nan Zhiyun's head, tidying her hair. Nan Zhiyun remained asleep, not uttering a word. Tears had yet to dry in the corners of her eyes; her heart ached.
"Sleep, rest for a while. You were frightened today," Yu Jingchen soothed her. He hadn't used much force earlier, afraid of actually hurting Nan Zhiyun, so even though her wrists were bound, there were no marks.
Nan Zhiyun turned her head away, unwilling to see Yu Jingchen. He didn't mind. Her anger was understandable, so he could accept her current demeanor.
"I won't pursue what happened today, and you don't need to dwell on it. The Empress Dowager and Nan Su will be fine. I won't do anything to them, so you don't have to worry. Let this matter pass." Yu Jingchen knew she must be worried about Nan Su and the Empress Dowager, so he informed her in advance, sparing her the anxiety of not being able to ask.
Indeed, upon hearing news of the Empress Dowager and her father, Nan Zhiyun's coldness finally flickered, a hint of emotion appearing in her eyes.
"Sleep for a while. When you wake up, I'll have dinner sent over. You must eat. If you throw a tantrum and refuse to eat later... someone will suffer, okay?" Yu Jingchen was employing a mix of persuasion and pressure.
Constant indulgence would be useless. He wanted Nan Zhiyun to stay, but more than that, he wanted her to stay willingly. Of course, if Nan Zhiyun continued to be like this, he wouldn't let her go.
As he had said before, he couldn't accept Nan Zhiyun leaving, so no matter what happened, he wouldn't let her go!
That evening, Yu Jingchen ordered the imperial kitchen to prepare a meal. Nan Zhiyun's health was not fully recovered, so her medicine was essential. Perhaps due to her newfound apprehension, Nan Zhiyun didn't act too willfully this time. She didn't refuse to eat or resist taking her medicine.
"I'll stay with you tonight. I won't leave," Yu Jingchen said. He had given her too much freedom before. When Nan Zhiyun disliked something, he would try to stay away from her, and certainly wouldn't force her to sleep with him at night.
But things were different now. He wouldn't leave. Nan Zhiyun's hand, holding the medicine bowl, paused when she heard this. Her attitude was clear, but unfortunately, Yu Jingchen wouldn't pander to it this time.
Because Nan Zhiyun was afraid of the dark, Yu Jingchen, as always, didn't extinguish the lights completely. However, for some reason, Nan Zhiyun seemed even more afraid of the dark now than before. Even with the lights on, she felt suffocated.
Yu Jingchen pulled her into his embrace. "I'm here..." he soothed her. Nan Zhiyun was scared, but she could only endure her emotions, as she couldn't rely on Yu Jingchen in her current situation.
In the latter half of the night, Nan Zhiyun trembled violently, her body covered in a fine sheen of sweat. Yu Jingchen noticed the anomaly. Earlier, he had assumed Nan Zhiyun was merely avoiding his touch, not expecting other reasons. But the current situation suggested otherwise.
"Yun'er?" Yu Jingchen's heart began to race.
Nan Zhiyun curled into a small ball, her eyes closed. Sweat covered her forehead, though it was unclear whether it was from fear or pain.
Yu Jingchen summoned an imperial physician. However, the physicians in the palace were truly useless. After taking her pulse, they merely stated she was frightened and that Nan Zhiyun was weak and prone to sweating. Hearing such answers, Yu Jingchen felt like discarding the physician; such platitudes served no purpose.
Yu Jingchen lifted Nan Zhiyun, holding her close, and ordered others to fetch warm water.
"Yun'er, it's alright..." Yu Jingchen whispered, comforting her. Had his earlier actions truly frightened her, causing this fear? Nan Zhiyun was unconscious, but her reactions indicated no lessening of her terror. Yu Jingchen personally bathed her; it wasn't the first time, and he was adept at it.
Yu Jingchen himself did not rest that night due to Nan Zhiyun. It was only when dawn broke that Nan Zhiyun finally fell into a deep sleep. The Empress Dowager and Nan Su, having heard that Nan Zhiyun had been found, remained worried. After all, neither of them could control Yu Jingchen's emotions for Nan Zhiyun. And... could Yu Jingchen, in his fury, truly control his temper? What if he hurt Yun'er?
However, no matter how much they worried about Nan Zhiyun, they couldn't leave. Yu Jingchen hadn't given his consent; who would dare release them?
When Nan Zhiyun woke up, the attendants around her were all strangers. She understood her situation perfectly. Seeing that Nan Zhiyun had finally woken, the palace maids hurried over. "Your servant greets Concubine Shu. Does Concubine Shu wish to rise? Your servant will help you change."
Nan Zhiyun did not respond. She silently got out of bed. The palace maids rushed to assist her, but Nan Zhiyun refused. The maids dared not insist, and simply followed behind her. She looked around; Yu Jingchen was no longer there. As Nan Zhiyun reached for the door, a palace maid quickly stepped forward to open it for her.
Nan Zhiyun ignored her, looking out at the scene. The entrance was guarded by people Yu Jingchen had assigned.
"Concubine Shu," the guards bowed as Nan Zhiyun emerged.
"I want to go out. Make way." Nan Zhiyun's face was impassive. The guards didn't try to dissuade her. "Your Highness may proceed."
Nan Zhiyun glanced at the guards and walked directly outside. However, she was stopped at the grand entrance of Zichen Palace.
"Concubine Shu, please forgive this servant. His Majesty has decreed that you may roam freely within the Zichen Palace courtyard, but you may not leave this courtyard gate." The guard spoke sternly.
"Make way," Nan Zhiyun repeated.
"Concubine Shu, please forgive this servant. If you leave, all the palace maids attending you will lose their lives today." The guard knelt. Nan Zhiyun lowered her gaze. "What does that have to do with me?"
"The Empress Dowager and General Nan are still in the palace..." This statement struck Nan Zhiyun's weak spot. She knew a mere guard wouldn't dare to act without Yu Jingchen's orders and tacit approval...
"Concubine Shu, please return to your palace with this servant." The palace maid looked distressed.
Nan Zhiyun stood still. The attendants behind her knelt and pleaded, "Please, Concubine Shu, show mercy!" This was coercion.
Nan Zhiyun stood for a long time. But how could she resist these people? They had staked their lives on her. If Concubine Shu suffered the slightest mishap, none of them would escape.
After Nan Zhiyun returned to her chambers, the palace maids ordered breakfast to be served, watching her eat. Yu Jingchen arrived after the morning court. Nan Zhiyun pretended not to see him.
"I heard from the subordinates that you wished to go out?" Yu Jingchen's voice was gentle but ineffective.
"Can I accompany you for a walk later?" Yu Jingchen continued. Nan Zhiyun remained silent. Yu Jingchen seemed to have little patience these past two days, so he made the final decision.
"Someone, bring Concubine Shu's change of clothes and help her prepare," Yu Jingchen stood up from his seat and reached for Nan Zhiyun's hand, but she dodged him. Yu Jingchen's hand froze.
"Yun'er doesn't want me to touch her?" Yu Jingchen looked at her, then without regard for her willingness, stepped forward, pulled her into his embrace, and held her tightly.
"Nan Zhiyun, my patience is limited. Don't anger me again, alright? Didn't you want to go out just now? Now I'm taking you out, why are you unwilling? Hmm?" A trace of coldness tinged Yu Jingchen's voice, sending chills through the bone.
Nan Zhiyun trembled slightly, afraid to speak. She did indeed hate Yu Jingchen, but that didn't mean her fear of him had lessened.
"I'll help you get dressed," Yu Jingchen disregarded Nan Zhiyun's wishes, pulling her towards the dressing table. He picked up the eyebrow pencil first.
"Yun'er, you mentioned you still had some memories? I don't know what happened back then, but today I'll tell you about my memories of this time." Yu Jingchen spoke without inflection, instilling a sense of unease in Nan Zhiyun.
"Yun'er, do you think the things I've done seem strange in your memories? I've never done these things before, but in the memories of my past life, I've done them countless times. Helping you get dressed, styling your hair, coaxing you to take medicine, accompanying you for meals, telling you stories... I know how to do all of it..." Yu Jingchen picked up the eyebrow pencil and began to shape Nan Zhiyun's brows.
"I don't know if your memories simply lack these details, or if you have these memories but refuse to recall them, pretending to have forgotten. But I can't forget. Not only can I not forget, but I vividly remember how I felt after you left. So... Yun'er, stop thinking of leaving. I won't allow it. No matter how you plan, you can't escape, and you'll only make the current situation worse, understand?" Yu Jingchen put down the eyebrow pencil.
Nan Zhiyun remained unresponsive to Yu Jingchen's words. She remembered none of what he said. Perhaps it had happened, but... he hadn't appeared in her memories. Instead, she clearly recalled the things Yu Jingchen had done to her, and to the Empress Dowager and the Nan family...
Yu Jingchen lifted Nan Zhiyun's chin, forcing her to look at him. "You hold many lives in your hands, so you must be well. Otherwise, those people will suffer for you. This isn't a threat, merely a reminder." Yu Jingchen had made his intentions clear.
Nan Zhiyun looked at him. The room fell silent. After a long pause, Nan Zhiyun finally spoke in a hoarse voice, "Why can't you let me go?"
Why can't you let me go? The words pierced Yu Jingchen's heart. Why? Where were there so many whys?
"As I said, you can do whatever you want wantonly, as long as it's within the boundaries. Those boundaries are your body, and... staying by my side properly." Yu Jingchen did not answer directly.
"So... you want to torment me forever?" Nan Zhiyun asked him, her tone filled with desolation, but more so with bitterness. Yu Jingchen's Adam's apple bobbed, his expression complex.
"It's not torment. How things develop depends on you. If you behave, everything will be fine. If you can't let go, then this life will be intertwined with mine forever." Yu Jingchen told Nan Zhiyun that it wasn't what he would do, but what Nan Zhiyun herself would do...
Nan Zhiyun stopped wasting her breath and simply looked into Yu Jingchen's eyes. Perhaps sensing her emotions, Yu Jingchen dared not meet her gaze any longer. "Alright, change into something else. When you're ready, I'll take you out." Yu Jingchen changed the subject.
He released Nan Zhiyun. Perhaps due to the emotional surge earlier, he hadn't controlled his strength, and Nan Zhiyun's wrist already bore red marks. Yu Jingchen noticed this and felt a sudden pang of regret, blaming himself.