Chapter 389: 0245 Bad Things (Two in One)
The rain outside is still pouring heavily.
The breakfast isn’t exactly sumptuous, but it’s Yun Qian’s favorite vegetarian noodles.
Yun Qian ate with elegance, but her slurping wasn’t slow at all.
Xu Chang’an thought that Yun Qian must truly be hungry.
And also...
When Yun Qian looked up at him, Xu Chang’an instinctively averted his gaze.
Afraid to look.
He was actually stalling for time when Yun Qian wanted to go to the restroom to pick flowers?
Was watching her getting anxious, her pretty face turning red with urgency, really so amusing?
Hiss.
Maybe... it was slightly amusing.
Besides, he didn’t do it on purpose; he just absentmindedly stalled for time. Does that mean he was being malicious?
"..." Xu Chang’an lowered his head, eating his own bowl of noodles, then curled his lips into a smile.
Self-deception stops here.
Recently, he really had been getting better at teasing people, not sure if that was a good or bad thing.
As he was thinking this, Yun Qian seemed to notice something. She put down her chopsticks and stared blankly at Xu Chang’an for a moment, then lowered her eyes and said, "Do you... enjoy watching me get anxious?"
"Huh?" Xu Chang’an paused in his noodle slurping, swallowed his food, and said awkwardly, "Miss, I was wrong."
"Wrong? Not at all." Yun Qian shook her head. She just thought that Xu Chang’an seemed happy earlier, and as for whether she was upset because she’d been teased... as long as it made him happy, Yun Qian would also be happy.
"I just... don’t quite understand what makes you happy... about that?" Yun Qian was puzzled.
In her everyday life, she always "cultivated" how to be a good wife. So when she found out that Xu Chang’an was happy because he delayed taking her to pick flowers, she wanted to understand why.
Apparently, it wasn’t just Xu Chang’an who cared; Yun Qian cared a lot too.
"Miss, I know I’m not a good person, so just don’t ask..." Xu Chang’an felt that his wicked intentions were being utterly cleansed under the forces of Yun Qian, who seemed like the Great Sun.
At this point, he just wanted to go to Buddha and confess all his unforgivable sins.
But in a way, teasing her was actually a good thing, equivalent to... justice trying to conquer evil?
Xu Chang’an didn’t understand these things; he just felt like he wasn’t acting like a human being today.
Yun Qian: "..."
Miss Yun wouldn’t take Xu Chang’an’s "repentance" to heart, so she took a bite of her noodles, drank a sip of soup, and after giving her husband enough time to sort out his feelings, asked again, "So... why?"
"Fine, Miss always has to uncover my dark thoughts." Xu Chang’an sighed, then held up a finger, "The gap moe, do you understand?"
Normally, Yun Qian always kept a calm face, whether interested or not. Even someone as close to her as Xu Chang’an could only infer her emotions through subtle expressions.
So suddenly seeing Yun Qian with such evident emotional fluctuations made him want to look a little longer.
"The gap... is about me?" Yun Qian tilted her head, thinking about how she looked when trying to pick the flowers and couldn’t understand what was so amusing.
"You see." Xu Chang’an decided to go all out, thinking he had nothing to lose. So he said, "Has Miss ever been anxious about anything?"
"Anxious..." Yun Qian gave Xu Chang’an a deep look, then lightly shook her head, "I... rarely feel anxious."
Because she’s lived long enough.
Or because time has no meaning.
In her eyes, time, even its beginning and end, is just an instantaneous line across her palm, so how could she be anxious about anything other than her husband?
"Rarely?" Xu Chang’an was stunned.
Rarely means it happens?
Miss Yun gets anxious?
How come he didn’t know?
Even when Yun Qian felt hungry while eating... she would just lightly remind him and never show an impatient expression.
At least, Xu Chang’an had never seen it.
Come to think of it, even in his dreams last night of Miss Yun... when Xu Chang’an kept evading, Yun Qian kept following, until she had half a foot on the mat. When Xu Chang’an wanted to go inside, Yun Qian still agreed.
Her temperament is really gentle, doing everything slowly and leisurely, and being with Yun Qian, experiencing her life, requires excellent patience to discover the beauty within it.
But despite being stunned, Xu Chang’an explained, "For me, psychologically, it’s hard to see Miss get anxious, so... just now..."
Xu Chang’an thought about how he had stored many memories of Yun Qian in his mind, and the recently collected and unlocked scene of Yun Qian being too weak to walk to the West Pavilion, flushed with urgency, is something he definitely could treasure.
It is a rare treasure.
For this, even if Miss Yun thought it was bullying, it was worth it.
This was all he was capable of doing.
"...I understand." Yun Qian, too, was casually looking for things to talk about while eating, as talking to her husband was the best side dish. She didn’t like the rule about being silent while eating or sleeping.
Yun Qian glanced down, recalling how Xu Chang’an lifted her skirt earlier, trying to understand... the emotions described in books when girls experienced something similar: shyness, blushing... or even heart fluttering.
In the end, she still felt utterly calm.
Completely incomprehensible.
Why should a wife feel shy about her husband supporting her to the West Pavilion?
Looking up at Xu Chang’an, Yun Qian blinked. Her initially good mood suddenly turned a bit solemn because she realized if Xu Chang’an saw her fully and sincerely as a wife, he wouldn’t consider such things as little acts of bullying.
Yet, like a child, he was happy about this mischief...
His happiness was Yun Qian’s happiness.
Therefore, now Yun Qian’s mood was inexplicably stuck between happiness and unhappiness, confusing even herself.
"I’ve... had enough." Yun Qian pushed her bowl in front of Xu Chang’an.
"Mm." Xu Chang’an nodded, as usual, poured the remaining noodles from Yun Qian’s bowl into his own, picked up his chopsticks, and was about to eat when his fingers paused, and he asked seemingly casually, "Miss said earlier that you rarely get anxious, so... what can make you feel uncontrollably anxious?"
Yun Qian didn’t hesitate, "Knowing you’re coming home soon."
Xu Chang’an: "..."
Alright.
He lowered his head, took a sip of soup, and when he looked up again, Xu Chang’an sighed.
Miss Yun always managed to give him a critical hit unintentionally; this was her passive skill and trait... yet he himself, to this day, still couldn’t get used to this kind of genuine damage.
Xu Chang’an didn’t ask Yun Qian why she never showed any surprise face upon seeing him return home; could that also be considered anxious?
Because he knew.
The anxiety Yun Qian spoke of wasn’t something surface-level, and asking further would ruin the moment.
——
Yun Qian didn’t lie.
She occasionally did feel restless and unsettled.