Chapter 146: Temptation, I Can’t Escape You [June’s POV]
Ren’s smiled, and stretched his arm out.
I squinted, trying to focus, and then my stomach dropped.
He wasn’t stretching his arm to me. He was stretching them to someone else.
My chest tightened, as I watched her smile, as the curve of her shoulder brushed against his chest.
Her wet hair clung to her shoulders, as he tucked them behind her ears.
She was beautiful, every inch of her was perfect. The warmth in his expression was not for me.....it was for her.
She leaned in, and he didn’t hesitate. His lips met hers.
And just like that... every hope I’d been stupid enough to cradle shattered in my chest.
I froze. The water instantly became cold.
My throat burned.
He looked happy. She looked perfect. And I....
I couldn’t even move. I wanted to scream, to drown, to disappear into the water and never come up. But my eyes stayed locked on him,
he didn’t even notice I was there.
My hands gripped the edge, trying to steady the shock, the sting of betrayal I hadn’t expected.
My whole body felt frozen in place, watching the person I’d been chasing, dreaming of, literally swimming toward, being claimed by someone else.
And I.... I couldn’t breathe.
Like actually, my heart just stopped.
Ren’s laughed echoed in my ears.
The way he touched her body. The way his hand held on her waist.
God. The way he kept kissing her... like it was nothing.
Like I didn’t exist.
It was suppose to be me.
My stomach hurt so hard I thought I was gonna puke. My fingers dug into the pool’s edge.
I should leave, turn away. Or anything.
But I just stood there.
Still watching them, drowning without even going under.
The song changed.
The kind of music that feels like it crawls under your skin, like it was written for this moment.
Tears started blurring my eyes. No, not here. Not now.
But the more I fought them, the more they came.
Every beat stabbed my heart. Every lyric was like, "Temptation, I can’t escape you."
And God... it hurts.
The same neon lights started stinging my eyes, but nope.....it wasn’t the lights. It was me.
I pressed my palms against my stomach, walking out of the pool, trying to hold myself together.
I shoved through the crowd, fast, like if I moved quick enough, maybe the ache in my chest wouldn’t catch up.
Someone bumped into me, laughing, spilling beer down my arm. I didn’t care.
I just needed out.
By the time I found the a quiet hallway, I was gone. My legs gave up, and I slid down the wall, shaking so bad I dropped to the floor.
I bit my lip to silence the sob that tore out of me anyway.
The ugly ones. The ones you can’t swallow down even if you try. My throat burned, my chest cracked open, as I cried.
The kind that makes you cover your mouth with both hands because you don’t want anyone to hear, but the sound rips out of you anyway.
I can’t believe this was happening.
Ren. My Ren.
I hated it.
I hated myself more.
I literally wore a nice outfit for him.
He didn’t notice I was there, even my hottest look doesn’t compare to hers.
I held my chest, as i kept breathing faster.
The guy I’d had a crush on since my first week at Blackwell.
The one who walked into music class and I gasped so loud people stared.
The one whose shoes I ruined with jellybeans when I puked. And instead of laughing with everyone else... he smiled, patted my head. And called me Jellybean.
My throat closed. God. He still calls me that. Like it’s cute.
And two days ago, just two days... we were alone in his basement, writing that stupid song. Our knees kept bumping under the table. And I swear I felt it. The spark.
But right now?
That spark wasn’t mine.
It was hers.
Why was his hand on her waist? Why was his smile...his stupid, perfect smile, belong to her?
Maybe deep down, I always knew.
He was never mine.
And maybe he never will be.
And that realization?
It killed me more than watching him kiss her.
It felt like every memory I’d been holding on to... every laugh, every glance, every time he said "c’mon
, Jellybean" shattered all at once.My arms were locked around my knees, face buried, chest hiccupping from the sobs that wouldn’t stop.
The hallway was dim, buzzing faintly with bazz from the party down the hall, but here...it was just me, shivering from the cold, and the ache that wouldn’t leave.
Suddenly, something heavy and warm dropped over my shoulders.
I jerking my head up.
Ian.
Of course. It had to be him.
He stood over me, hair damp, chest rising and falling like he’d sprinted here.
I groaned, rolling my eyes.
"What."
He didn’t answer right away, just kept holding the blanket tighter around me, tucking it so it covered most of me like he was annoyed at how I’d been sitting there in a wet swimsuit.
I glared at him, but my voice cracked. "Now you’ve seen me crying. I probably look hideous. Happy now?"
His jaw flexed. "No, you don’t." His voice was softer than I’d ever heard it. "You look well...not fine, but not ugly either." He shoved another piece of fabric toward me.... someone’s black shirt, probably his. "Cover yourself. You’re half naked, shivering like an idiot. Who walks out of the pool soaking wet with no towel?"
The sarcasm was there, but I wasn’t in the mood.
I blinked at him, hugging the blanket tighter.
He sighed dramatically, nodding his head. "Seriously? You stormed out dramatically. Do you know how stupid you look? Shaking, crying, dripping everywhere."
"Wow, thanks," I snapped, but my throat burned.
But then his mouth twitched, like he was fighting a laugh. "And still...somehow you make it look..." He cut himself off, running a hand through his wet hair. "Forget it. Just...cover up before you catch cold."
"Thanks." I glanced and him, dropped my head back on my knees.
He sat back against the wall beside me, close enough our knees brushed, the warmth radiating from him was impossible to ignore.
I couldn’t even push him ’cause suddenly, I wasn’t shivering anymore.
And maybe that should’ve comforted me.
But the thought wouldn’t leave my head, no matter how hard I shoved it away.
Of all people in the world... why did it have to be Ian Han who found me like this?
Now, even the Universe is mocking me.