Wu Wa, having frolicked throughout the mansion before, was intimately familiar with every corner of the estate.
The small courtyard had previously been used for storing coffins and served as a mourning hall for deceased servants of the mansion.
Therefore, located in the most secluded corner of the large estate, far from the main courtyard, separated by a lotus pond, bamboo grove, flowerbeds, and rockeries, any shouting there would not be heard in the main courtyard.
Although the courtyard was small, it had a well. It was currently piled high with雜物 (záwù - sundries). If all the sundries were cleared out, Uncle Cripple and Uncle Fool could be settled there.
“But Uncle Fool can’t be contained. What if he suddenly runs to the main courtyard?” Tian Dou raised a potential issue.
Lu Yu asked, “Why don’t we just be upfront with Eldest Brother and Sister-in-law? Ask them to take in Uncle Cripple and Uncle Fool?”
Tian Ya quickly shook his head, “No. I want to support them myself. I absolutely cannot cause more trouble for Master and Mistress. Besides, we can’t just bring anyone home; it would put Master and Mistress in a difficult position.”
Tie Zhu spread his hands, “But what can we do? Uncle Fool could be exposed at any moment.”
Tian Ya furrowed his brows in thought, then suddenly smiled, “He won’t be. I have a way to keep Uncle Fool still for a whole day.”
Wu Wa’s eyes lit up, “What way?”
Tian Ya smiled, “Uncle Fool loves carving wood the most. I’ll get him a set of carving tools and some wood. He can carve all day. He used to use a broken small knife to carve a little figure for me, but it was snatched away by other beggars later.”
“In that case, it’ll be very easy to handle,” Lu Yun chuckled. “Then we’ll move Uncle Fool there tonight. We’ll use some anesthetic to knock him out first. Tomorrow, we’ll go get Uncle Cripple and have Uncle Cripple tie him up, then buy him a set of carving tools.”
The four children all nodded.
After Uncle Fool finished the few steamed buns, Tian Ya handed him his water skin, letting him drink his fill.
“Uncle Fool, we’re taking you to play a fun game, okay?” Tian Ya cajoled.
“Okay, okay, play, what game?” The thin man, over 1.8 meters tall, hopped and skipped, clapping his hands. If the children didn’t know he was a fool, everyone would have been disgusted by the scene.
Lu Yun smiled, “A game of crawling through dog holes! Let’s all crawl through a dog hole from behind the mansion to go home, okay?”
“Okay! Crawl through dog holes, I like it the most!” Uncle Fool jumped up and down excitedly.
Wu Wa led Uncle Fool to the dog hole. First, he had San Gouzi clear out the dog hole. Then Lu Yun crawled in first, followed by Uncle Fool. Fortunately, Uncle Fool was as thin as a rake, so crawling through the dog hole was easy.
Under the cover of night, Wu Wa, with Uncle Fool, tiptoed to the secluded small courtyard in the northwest corner.
Lu Yun winked at Tian Dou. Tian Dou walked towards Uncle Fool, smiling and saying, “Uncle Fool, squat down, I’ll give you something delicious to eat.”
As soon as Uncle Fool heard there was something delicious, he immediately squatted down, facing Tian Dou, and opened his mouth wide.
Tian Dou’s eyes widened, and he looked back at the others.
Everyone held their foreheads. Alright, none of them had ever seen such a foolish fool.
Tian Ya felt even more strongly that he should take care of Uncle Fool. Otherwise, with his foolishness, who knew what kind of mischief he would fall victim to. Someone could throw a pile of feces into his mouth, and he would happily eat it.
Uncle Fool: I’m not foolish. If the feces don’t taste good, I won’t eat them.
Tian Dou pinched a bit of anesthetic and dropped it into Uncle Fool’s mouth unobstructed. Uncle Fool even smacked his lips happily. A few breaths later, his eyes closed, and he fell straight backward.
Wu Wa accurately caught him from behind.
To ensure he slept for a longer period, Tian Dou simply poured the remaining anesthetic into his mouth.
After all, taking too much of this anesthetic would only lead to a deep sleep, with no side effects.
After settling Uncle Fool, the children secretly breathed a sigh of relief. They all stood in the small courtyard, looking around.
Lu Yun said, “Tomorrow morning, we’ll bring Uncle Cripple over, and also clean up the small courtyard. They’ll live here from now on.”
All the children nodded in agreement.
When they returned to the main courtyard, dinner was about to be served. Everyone was waiting for them in the front hall.
If they had returned any later, Bai Sheng would have sent people to look for them.
When Wu Wa, carrying a cloth bag, appeared in the front hall, dusty and dishevelled, all eyes turned to them.
At this moment, Uncle Ding, carrying a soup pot, exclaimed in surprise, “Ah! Second Master, how did I not hear you knock? Where did you come in from?”
Following Uncle Ding’s question, Bai Sheng and Lu Ye’s gazes towards Wu Wa made their legs go even softer.
Lu Yun forced a smile, “Uncle Ding, we… we crawled in through the dog hole.”
“Dog hole?!” Uncle Ding was startled. “But… don’t we have a perfectly good door?”
Lu Yun scratched the back of his head, saying sheepishly, “We just… just… just wanted to experience what it’s like to be a dog!”
*Puchi!*
Everyone burst into laughter.
Uncle Ding almost dropped his soup pot.
The three foolish dogs: We also eat feces, do you want to experience it?
Bai Sheng suppressed his laughter and looked at them, asking sternly, “Today, you were playing outside all day. Be honest, did you do anything bad?”
Wu Wa quickly shook their heads in unison, saying, “No! Absolutely not!”
Bai Sheng continued with a serious face, “Did you do anything dangerous?”
“No! Absolutely not!”
Bai Sheng glanced at Lu Ye. Lu Ye said sternly, “Lu Tie and the others’ socks in the east courtyard, did you play a prank and hide them?”
Lu Tie and the others were startled.
Oh dear, why would Master bring this up before dinner? They had only mentioned the dogs, not Second Master and them.
Besides, their socks, just thinking about them was smelly, let alone a few pairs of socks. If Second Master and they liked playing, they could take them to play.
Lu Yun gave a signal to his four younger brothers. Wu Wa was about to take the socks out of his backpack.
Everyone was greatly surprised and immediately prepared to cover their mouths and noses.
Lu Ye, with his quick hands, immediately said, “No need to take them out now! After dinner, you will personally deliver them to the east courtyard and apologize to Brother Lu Tie and uncles Lu Tu and Lu Shui.”
“Yes, Eldest Brother,” Lu Yun nodded.
“Yes, Eldest Brother (Master, Grand Uncle),” Tian Dou and the four children replied in unison.
Lu Ye continued, “You stole socks from the east courtyard, what did you do out there?”
“Participated in a foot odor competition!” Lu Yun blurted out. Since Eldest Brother mentioned the socks, he had begun to quickly brainstorm in his mind how to explain the use of the stolen socks.
At this moment, the more concisely he answered, the more it would prove they weren't lying.
Foot odor competition? There’s such a competition?
However, these few mischievous monkeys had even competed in urinating in Hongshu Village. A foot odor competition seemed like nothing.
Seeing everyone looking at them in surprise, Lu Yun said, “Some of our classmates said their feet were the smelliest in Great Xia, with no one daring to compete. We were not convinced, so we took the socks of Brothers Tie, Tu, and Shui to compete.”
Everyone burst into laughter again.
Lu Tie, Lu Shui, and Lu Tu, although their faces were red with embarrassment, felt as if cat’s claws were scratching their hearts. What to do? They were so perverted, they actually wanted to know if Second Master and they had won.
Everyone: Excuse us, we actually really want to know too.
Lu Ye slightly curved the corners of his lips, “So, did you win?”
Tie, Tu, and Shui breathed a sigh of relief. Finally, the key question was asked. Everyone also looked at Lu Yun with anticipation.
Lu Yun and his four younger brothers exchanged glances, then surveyed the crowd, their expressions becoming more and more teasing.
“Did you win or not?” Lu Ye roared.